« Why I Am Proud To Be An American (Perhaps For The First Time)! | Home
How To Deal With Life In Tough Times
By Todd | January 8, 2009
Living in Manhattan, I know several people who have recently lost their jobs. Most of these people are smart, educated, driven, great in their careers…and many of them have families, mortgages, and a ton of responsibilities. Understandably, they are scared.
What makes the present situation even more terrifying is the underlying sense that something is very different this time. We are seeing breakdown after breakdown within many of the socio-economic realities that we have taken for granted as being ‘safe and sound’ for so long.
Many of the newly jobless will have a tougher find finding employment in their line of work…and many will see the industry they toiled for so long completely disappear.
From the 30,000-foot level, we have to realize that this is OK…as the ‘unsustainable’ is finally showing to be, well, unsustainable. And amid all the breakdowns there are, and will continue to be, many fantastic break-throughs that will literally transform what it means to be a human being in this world!
But this can be extremely difficult to see right now as we are smack-dab in the middle of it, directly in the thick and dense processing phase where it is so easy to get lost in fear and anxiety.
The question naturally arising in SO many is: “Well, what should I do”? This is the 100 Million dollar question right now, and it’s a good one. And I am not going to propose any universal answer in this article.
Rather, my purpose is to simply shine awareness on what is happening, and to get your mind stirring whether you personal world has been shaken or not, because ALL of us are being affected by the massive transition happening on this planet right now.
We ALL need to be vigilant and aware, and to allow ourselves to be guided (as gently as possible) to the next phase of our evolution.
The writing is on the wall, our biggest systems are breaking down, greed and separation do not work. Rest assured, there IS hope for a better tomorrow…and much of it depends on how we deal with the challenges today!
So, What SHOULD I Do?
Begin to realize that when things in the external field become chaotic and stressed, our minds like to pull us even more externally searching for answers.
But the answers are not ‘out there’. They are within you, and when times are tough we need to be even stronger and cultivate the ability to look within for solutions.
As hard as it seems to do, NOW is the time for powerful self-reflection, stillness and patience.
Yes, I fully understand how this sounds. Life is throwing all kinds of challenges at you, things need to be dealt with, handled, and brought to some kind or order…and this blogger guy is telling you to meditate and not do anything.
But that is not the case. Being patient and still, and moving slowly and thoughtfully throughout your day creates the necessary space for greater wisdom to come to the forefront.
It may take time, but the answer to the question ‘what should I do’ is always there. Another great thing to do is constantly gain perspective on your life situation. Try this exercise:
Get Great-Grand Perspective
We so easily lose sight of the fact that our lives as human beings are fleeting, microscopic and meaningless. Think about your great grandparents.
Many of you may have memories of some (or all) of your grandparents…but very few of us can remember anything about the next generation back.
Close your eyes and try to imagine the lives of your recent ancestors…these people who lived and breathed at one point, and who are your family. You may or may not know something about who they were, but just try and think how important everything must have seemed to them.
I know my great grandparents came from Hungary and Russia, and came to the United States in the early 1900’s and raised my grandparents.
How much they must have struggled and stressed…living through World Wars and depressions…and how much joy they must have had, experiencing a new country, new possibilities, and new way of being in the world.
When you take a moment and really go back, it is amazing to think about.
But your great grandparents are gone. Forever. Dust in the wind. All the stress and anxiety they felt amounted to nothing but a forgotten history. All the successes and triumphs they achieved mean nothing today.
And how often are these people thought and talked about? Not much, if ever.
You must realize that one day your existence will suffer the same fate. Everything in your life that you take as SO important, everything that is SO real to you will not matter and soon be forgotten as if it never mattered at all.
Yes, in a very real sense your life (our lives!) are totally meaningless and void of any value in the greatest scheme of things.
But What About ‘The Real World’?
When I say things like this to friends and family, the response is usually “OK, I get it, but what’s the point of saying that? Does that mean I should sit around and do nothing if it all meaningless and purposeless? Should I never go to work, have relationships, raise a family, and try to get ahead in the world”?
Of course not! These questions are simply missing the point. Knowledge of our meaninglessness is freedom; freedom to explore the life that you were meant to lead; freedom to see the places you were meant to see; freedom to interact with the people that you were meant to interact.
The ‘real world’ can often be like a prison, incarcerating you in all of the heavy expectations that were ingrained in you as a young person. Realizing the absolute non-meaning of your life is lightness, freedom and joy!
Imagine living with no limitations, and having pure unadulterated liberty to allow your inner most soul uncover itself moment by moment! This is the blessing that was granted to you upon being born….yet it is SO easily forgotten.
And attaining perspective of our purpose-less existence does NOT mean that you should ‘sit around and do nothing’. On the contrary, truly experiencing this breakthrough leads to powerful and swift action.
The action you take becomes determined by intuition, purpose and love as opposed to fear, stress and external circumstances. You become free, featherweight and empowered to lead the life you were meant to!
SO even though times seem tough, and the world as we know it appears to be disintegrating before our very eyes, constantly bring yourself inward, give yourself perspective, and have awareness that new realities are being born that will make ALL of our lives extraordinary!
*If you like this article, please share it with a friend. Thank you 
Subscribe Free
| |||
|
Topics: Perspective, Finances, Alternative and Holistic Healing, Spirituality/Meditation, Career |
Hi Todd,
I am a fellow New Yorker who recently discovered your blog. I love your writing! This post is great and so very true. Going within, getting quiet and taking full responsibility for ourselves can give us the most unexpected and miraculous answers as well as true freedom! It is amazing that when you realize each moment is meaningLESS, you can then see the possiblity of creating a meaningFUL existence! Thanks again for such refreshing thoughts!
Denise
Posted by: Denise on January 8th, 2009 at 1:10 pmTHANKS Denise, I really appreciate it! You and I are really in the thick of things in NYC
We really need to be the examples! All the best, ad feel well, Todd
Posted by: Todd on January 8th, 2009 at 1:12 pmI’m so glad to see you back, Todd, I just linked to this post and I’m going to tweet it.
Posted by: Akemi - Yes to Me on January 8th, 2009 at 1:44 pmI, too, sense the change we are going through is actually really good. It’s just destruction must precede creation.
THANKS Akemi!
Posted by: Todd on January 8th, 2009 at 4:26 pmMuch love to you…and wishing you the best in ‘09,
Todd
Thanks for the brilliant perspective. I instantly envisioned my grandmothers sitting on huge boats for days coming across the Atlantic, full of fear and worry. Their courage and hard work gave their children and grandchildren a life of freedom and opportunity.
Posted by: Ray Mannion on January 9th, 2009 at 9:39 amSo, we set the coffee pot timer for 30 minutes earlier and we get up, sharpen our pencils and get on with it knowing our future will reap the benefit.
Todd, this post rings very true for me. At the root of this is fear. I’ve noticed that fear is more present in people’s lives than ever before, and it’s because the things we thought were indestructible are in fact disintegrating around us. Fear comes from uncertainty.
I like the way you illustrate meaningless - all we really have are our thoughts - which create our reality. Our stories about the bad economy might very well be worse than the actual reality. We fill in the blanks with our imagination.
This topic is an important one - and I love your take on it!
Posted by: CoachCharrise on January 9th, 2009 at 9:53 amThanks for the kind words Ray and Charrise…I am glad I could offer some nice perspective!
Posted by: Todd on January 9th, 2009 at 12:14 pmTodd
in addition to what you said todd, i think attachment is one of the reasons we feel bad when lose something, if we thought ourselves how to detach from things fast we will be able to move on
Posted by: farouk on January 12th, 2009 at 6:39 amGreat post and very good timing for it. Every day more and more people are losing their jobs. So, its very easy to fall prey to fear.
I’ve taken this recession as an opportunity to really get back to what is important in my life. This is a time of change and will teach us to really put things in the right perspective. Its easy to not do this when we are stuck in the daily rat race.
I strongly recommend meditation to lose this fear and get courage to see life for what it really is, to deal with this recession, and to grow closer to what truly is important in this world; your family, yourself, and spirituality. It has done wonders for me and gave me the courage of leaving my practice as a lawyer for over five years and now publish online about meditation for other overstressed and busy professionals.
All the best to you and yours,
Sonia Gallagher
Posted by: Sonia Gallagher on May 13th, 2009 at 3:50 pmGood post Todd. You are right, if we are focused on the outside world, we will never be happy. Like the old song says, you can’t please everyone so better please yourself.
Posted by: Chris Phone on June 22nd, 2009 at 12:53 amI like your “thought experiment” here about ancestors and appreciate your basic point of suggesting that we need to get a larger perspective in hard times. In spiritual and religious discourse, this is often called “detachment” - a word about which there’s often a lot of confusion.
In any case, in my sixteenth year of an incurable rare disease and now completely housebound and mostly bedridden, I would have gone crazy or killed myself a long time ago if I hadn’t found that larger perspective…
Posted by: Paul Maurice Martin on July 22nd, 2009 at 1:46 pmThis is such a great article! Very moving, touching, yet heartwarming at the same time.
I totally agree with you, but I wouldn’t say this life is meaningless. Most of the people in the world don’t look at the big picture of life. They look at everything day-to-day, what is necessary for survival, and plan accordingly in the short-term span.
Most people are focused on abundance of wealth and material things. When they have it, they just want more. Does it really make them happy? In the short-term, most definitely, but what’s next?
There are times where I just contemplate about life. I honestly don’t believe that life is fate. I believe it is destiny and you create it yourself, but there are times where I have sat and wondered, “What if it’s fate? What if I’m destined to be in the situation I’m in? Shall I not still enjoy it?” Then I realized even if I’m not rich and I don’t have all the material things that I want, I should learn to enjoy this beautiful life. I shouldn’t mope and whine and watch life pass me by. There are people in much worse situations that would give anything to trade places with me. I have learned that a lot of times, it’s just how you perceive.
The picture of life is painted by you. It can be black/white and dull or really vibrant with brilliant colors. I was reading this article in the Atlantic magazine. It’s called “What Makes Us Happy?” It describes a Harvard longitudinal study, which analyzed the lives of many students from when they entered college up until they reach their old age or death. It’s really interesting! They interviewed candidates every few years, sent them questionnaires, and even perform physical examinations on them. It’s a very interesting article because it shows many different cases and how some people were successful early and hit rock bottom; whereas others were struggling and reach success later. Majority of them were pretty successful by the time they were in the 50s. You really get to see many different lives as a big picture, just like how you described our great-grandparents. To sum it up, these people all had their ups and downs. What separated them was how they coped with their obstacles. By altering your mindset and attitude, it will completely change the way you see the world.
Times are tough, but you can easily see it as an opportunity instead of a threat. One day, we’re probably going to sit down and tell our grandchildren these exciting stories. Life is adventurous! Learn to enjoy it while it lasts! (=
For those interested in reading the article, it is posted here: http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/200906/happiness
Posted by: taney on July 24th, 2009 at 1:20 amI really liked your thought of feeling featherweight…because it was all I needed at this moment!
Posted by: nirmal on July 29th, 2009 at 5:55 amBeing able to keep your mind positive is critical to change of any kind. You have to roll with the punches of life. Persistence and a mind filled with good thought can get you to the pace you deserve to be.
Posted by: jonathanfigaro on August 4th, 2009 at 6:55 pmWow. You are really amazing. You have said a mouth full. I’ll try to follow what you said. Thanks a lot.
Posted by: hypnosisadmin on August 6th, 2009 at 10:46 amFood must be grown in with a short growing season, and all of the farm stuff that used to be in a 1890 Sears catalog is no longer available. ,
Posted by: Arnold75 on October 13th, 2009 at 5:16 amGood post. When our inner purpose is to awaken to the Truth of who we really are, our outer purposes come and go, and we don’t look for completion in them. I haven’t been able to find job for over a year–and it turned out well because I’ve had the time to write books on awakening.
Posted by: Kaushik on October 15th, 2009 at 2:14 amIn general I find public schools to cater to the lowest common denominator. ,
Posted by: His_wife50 on October 22nd, 2009 at 5:31 amFor many staff, this can be an eye- opening experience. ,
Posted by: No_limits95 on October 23rd, 2009 at 5:07 am[…] Todd at We The Change just wrote an interesting post related to this: How To Deal With Life In Tough Times […]
Posted by: My Online Gratitude Journal 100th Post Edition #21 | Yes to Me on November 12th, 2009 at 8:15 pmi have read so many articles on such subjects, but really it is a valuable one and it is creystals of wisdom embedded.
Posted by: Ali on November 27th, 2009 at 2:49 pmthx a lot 4 the author!
Very Nice and Intresting post. I wish the Good work continues awakening more and more ppl in your future posts.
Posted by: Gopi on January 10th, 2010 at 2:22 pmGreat article, Todd! Indeed, many of our worries and fears are often baseless and if we enquire into them through meditation, they’re often not as dire as they make them out to be. Thanks for the illuminating article!
Posted by: The Conscious Life on January 17th, 2010 at 2:20 amThis comment is a little OT because it’s basically spurred by one phrase you used… but funnily enough someone was saying to me today about “the real world” this and that….
I was talking about how I see house ownership as a futile endevour which encourages a life of 9-5 slavery.
“Welcome to the real world.” was his response (not in a cynical way, he’s a friend of mine).
The truth is - their real world is nothing at all like mine - so I didn’t feel the need to respond.
I know that in his world owning a house and working 9-5 for the rest of his life is what he will do. He’ll be 70, own a property, have a family, and that’ll be that.
Nothing wrong with it - if that’s what you’re satisfied with.
But in my real world, that’s not what a smart adventurous ambitious person does at all ;).
Cheers!
Rich
Posted by: Rags on February 12th, 2010 at 9:52 amYeah makes sense… I did not lose my job, but quit it… To improve my career… Sometimes the zeal to do more in life makes you reach situations where you wonder if the decisions that you make were really sensible…
I am not your ordinary Joe, I come from a very well to do family, but the drive to do more has made me land in a situation, which I did not expect…
It’s always one day at a time, and hope that all your hard work pays off… And It always does, you just have to believe in yourself, never let the words of other people make you lose faith…
It works for me!
Peace…
Posted by: Joe on February 26th, 2010 at 4:10 am